I always thought I was the perfect parent, right up until the time I actually had children, now I'm not so sure. Some days I look at my offspring indulgently and think how lucky I am and then there are those other 364 days of the year.....
I gave my children life - and a damn good one at that - so you'd think once in a while they would show a little gratitude. Instead I get the following....
While we are standing in a check out line, Lindsay peers closely at me and hisses loudly "Mum you have a long granny whisker, can I pluck it out?" followed by a lunge at my chin. "Uh no and fuck off." I hiss back. Her turn will surely come.
Then there was Grady's contribution to my ego deflation. After giving him a hug he asks me, "Mum, have you always been this squishy?". I would have preferred he used the description "toned", but squishy it was. That day, the little bastard deserved everything Sid threw at him.
That brings me to Sid. Actually she's pretty good compared to the other two, other than the time if she asked me in all seriousness if I'd been on board the Titanic. Gotta love 'em.
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