Back To School

I am convinced that back to school requires more planning than took place for D-Day. Not so much for Lindsay now that she is in High School - although that does come with its own set of challenges, namely clothes shopping, which I try and avoid like the plague. I hate the mall with a passion, and anytime I do get dragged there kicking and screaming - and that is before I even have to open my wallet - it is like a journey into hell, I can smell the sulphur and hear the cries of the dammed.

It is the younger two children who are still at a Montessori (which after 13 years I still spell wrong) school that take me to the brink of insanity. The umpteen packages of Kleenex that are to be donated are relativity easy - although unless they plan on dealing with the Spanish Flu or the Bubonic Plague, I'm not sure why they need so many. Then there is the uniform - white shirts on my children ? Really ? Doomed from the outset. Follow that with three pairs of shoes each, locker shelves and then the classroom materials which read like a bloody inventory list for Business Depot. I don't so much mind the second mortgage I have to take out to purchase the supplies, but I do resent having to rent a U-Haul to transport everything to school on the first day.

So here we are, school starts tomorrow and I am dizzy with excitement - my children not so much. Sure they are looking forward to the social aspect, but the work ? No. Mind you, to be truthful I'm not too thrilled with that facet myself, at least where the homework is concerned. I fear the dreaded weekly spelling tests and cringe at the thought of the ghastly current events. I can only imagine the tantrums that will ensue in trying to get their work done on time - never mind the kid's reactions, that's just mine.

The more I think of it, the less excited I am. After all, I'm not good with early mornings and making lunches, add to that ferrying the kids back and forth and let's not forget those days where, in a last minute panic I run helter-skelter through the house trying to locate a relatively clean uniform shirt. Wow! At this rate I'm going to talk myself into home schooling the little delinquents, and I think we all know what a debacle that would turn out to be.

So goodbye to a long lazy summer, and hello to the start of a new school year. I managed to remain sane - everything is relative - for the ten weeks my darling children were at home, so I'm sure I can continue to hold it together for term time. If not, you'll be the first to know.  Good luck to everyone returning to school, teachers and students alike.