Half A Donut

Okay, I know I just recently posted a blog on my experiences with the Tim's drive-thru but that was before my encounter today. 

I picked Lindsay up from swim practice and we stopped at Tim's to get her something to eat before work. This is not a Tim's location I frequent on a regular basis, and after today, that infrequency will probably drop to zero. 

We pull up to the order window and I ask for a steak & cheese sandwich, no onions , extra cheese and half the sauce (Lindsay is just a little particular). At first there is silence and then a voice - that can only be described as gormless - asks "What kind of sandwich?", so I slowly repeat the order. I had to do this a few times until we finally settle on the "No onions and extra cheese", but the disembodied voice is having great difficulty with my third request, "Half the sauce".  She insists on asking if I want "Half the salt?".  No matter how slowly, how clearly, and how loudly I ask for "Half the sauce" the response is the same. 

By now there is a long line up of cars behind us, and Lindsay is muttering darkly beside me until she finally bursts out "Oh for f***s sake, it's your accent."  She has quite the little potty mouth on her. She then leans across me and screeches "HALF THE SAUCE", at which point the response comes back, the voice clearly relieved she has finally figured it out "Oh, you want half Hot Sauce". "NO!" we scream back in unison, "Just half the regular sauce". 

Satisfied now that she knows what she is doing, I proceed with the rest of the order. "One powdered donut and a medium coffee, double double, please". Again there is silence, and then the voice comes back incredulously "You want half a donut?". WTF ? where the hell does Tim's find these rocket scientists. I look at Lindsay and we both burst out laughing, while she resorts to some rather spectacular name calling, I re-iterate that we want a powdered donut.  The choice is blueberry or raspberry, and Lindsay chooses the latter. 

Finally, after what seems to have taken forever, we move forward to the pick up window where we come face to face with the girl behind the voice. OMG, gormless was right.  The first thing she hands me is the donut - fortunately a whole one, but unfortunately blueberry not raspberry.  Next comes the sandwich, but as yet no coffee, so we wait. Another girl comes to the window, surprised to still see us sitting there, or maybe it was because I was banging my head repeatedly on the steering wheel. She asked us what we were waiting for. "The coffee" I reply, politely, feeling anything but, and off she goes. Another minute or two and the first girl comes back to the window again, obviously puzzled to see that we haven't moved on. "Are you waiting for your sandwich?" she asks helpfully. Would that be the same sandwich she handed us a few minutes before and Lindsay is now eating ? "No" I replied, making drinking gestures with my hand "We are waiting for the coffee". My sweet daughter at this point explodes with "Motherf*****". Like I said potty mouth, I was shocked.

We finally get the coffee, and are relieved to be on our way.  A few moments later as we are laughing as to what idiot would ask for half a donut, Lindsay turned to me and said "They put hot sauce on the second half of my sandwich".  Motherf*****.