So today we put up our Christmas Tree, well actually our third tree, we tend to go to extremes in this house. If I had my way it would be five, but Rob put his foot down. Fair enough, we barely have room for the one we set up today.
It goes something like this, after several days of nagging from Sid & Grady, because they don't count the two artificial trees that are up and decorated, as far as they are concerned they want the real one, the one that their presents go under. "When are we getting the tree?", "When are we getting the tree?", "When are we getting the tree?". This goes on and on and on, you get the picture. Finally on Saturday when Rob can't take it anymore, he announces he is going to get the tree. "Who wants to come with me ?" he asks. This is greeted with complete silence. He tries again "I'm going to get the tree, who's coming with me?". More silence. It appears that Sid & Grady are engrossed in a TV program, a repeat no less, and they're really not too bothered about getting the tree. No way was Rob going to allow that and packs them in the van under duress.
In hindsight he probably should have gone alone. Grady was in a pissy mood because they weren't going to drive several hours out into the wilderness to cut down a tree in the pouring rain, as we have done in the past. So he just complained that whatever tree Rob picked was too small. On the other hand Sid couldn't have cared less, she had discovered a puppy, a muddy puppy at that. When she arrived home she took great delight in showing me the trail of muddy paw prints all over her clothes. Yay !
We had to allow the tree to dry overnight, and the grand set up was today. The tree goes up and Rob insists it was the easiest ever, a perfect size, plenty of room to navigate around it, and totally secure. However there are not enough lights. Out goes Rob, and comes home with more lights. Plugs them into the remote control, oops no batteries, out he goes again. By this time kids have gotten bored and moved off to other pursuits. Finally after dinner, the decorating begins. Decorations go on, tree falls down, pretty much a given in our house. It would appear that the tree isn't so secure after all, and the weight of the decorations has pulled the tree away from the wall and heading towards the floor. Something else not considered, with the decorations, there is now only 6" clearance between the tree and the couch. This does not bode well. So with my kitchen scissors in hand, Rob commences to prune the tree. "What are you doing ?" I shriek, "Leave the tree alone". He argues back "There's no room to move", unfortunately this is borne out almost immediately as Sid comes charging through the gap with Grady in hot pursuit and the tree continues to shake long after they have passed.
Finally satisfied, we pack away the boxes, and sit back to admire our beautiful, slightly lopsided tree. But wait, there is movement. The cat has gone behind the tree to throw up. Just f***ing lovely. Now it truly feels like Christmas.
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