Here goes, more things I learned the hard way...
- When you tell the teacher that you don't want to have to take your son home sick, unless his head is in the toilet or he
is spurting arterial blood, make sure she knows you were joking! Or better still, don't say it at all.
- Don't
rush to the front door to receive a package. It doesn't matter how many
times you explain that you were eager to get your hands on your latest
eBay purchase, your children will be convinced you have a crush on the
UPS guy.
- Never, ever enter into an agreement with your children whilst under the
influence of alcohol, sleep deprivation or the happy glow from too much
chocolate - it will come back and bite you in the ass. Now that I think of it, jet lag should also go on the list, because that is how I agreed to Grady getting his ear pierced. I still think I was set up.
- If you do agree to something, make it verbal not written. At least that way you can pretend it never happened.
- When you notice chunks of blonde hair in the bin, and your youngest daughter is now sporting bangs, there is a good chance she has a brother somewhere hiding a pair of scissors.
- Don't eavesdrop on your children's conversations. Otherwise, that is when you'll hear your son tell his friend "Oh no, my mum is waaay older than your mum!".
- And finally, I've learned that as a parent if you can't think on your feet and be ready to lie through your teeth you are doomed.
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